Since this blog is titled "Our Adventures in Parenthood" I like to post the tough stuff every now and then. I have a tendency to block out the bad stuff, so by posting it here, I won't forget that raising our kids wasn't all rainbows and unicorns.
Last week when I was working the church nursery, a little girl came up to me to show me her finger. I asked her if she pinched it, and she said no and pointed to Madelyn. I looked again and asked if she bit her and she said yes. I asked Madelyn if she bit her, and she told me yes. I was shocked because she hadn't bit anyone before. I asked Madelyn to tell the little girl she was sorry and that we don't bite. I tried to figure out what might have triggered her to do it. I had just finished reading the little girl a book and had her in my lap. I assumed she must have been jealous and trying to get my attention. Throughout the week I did a little research on biting, and realized that it's a normal behavior for a child her age and that she must have been trying to get my attention.
Fast forward one week. I had sort of blown off the incident, and I didn't want to bring it up again with her hoping that she totally forgot. She hadn't bit anyone since last week, so I didn't even worry that she would do it yesterday, especially since I was not there. We had a new volunteer and I was more concerned about showing her the ropes, so I didn't think to even say anything. She had to bring her 4 month old along with her (normally only children 12 months and older are in the nursery). Madelyn is obsessed with babies and taking care of them. I noticed that she was all over the baby as soon as she walked in, so I mentioned that they would have to really watch Madelyn around the baby. After mass we got back to the nursery and the new volunteer told me that she had to talk to me. Biting didn't even cross my mind, but it turns out that Madelyn bit her baby's hand, twice. The lady said that she had turned her back to turn on the cd when it happened. I think it's safe to say that she was jealous that she had the baby and looking for her attention. I felt horrible and haven't stopped thinking about it since.
We talked to our daycare provider and she said that a few weeks ago Madelyn did bite someone, but it seemed to be out of curiosity, and she hadn't done it since.
Since I'm pretty sure that the trigger is to get attention in the nursery in particular, I've decided to keep her out of the nursery for a couple of weeks. I've talked to her about it, and I think we're going to leave it at that and hope and pray that those moves will help her to outgrow it quickly! She's always putting things in her mouth, and I read that children who do that are more prone to biting, so she's pretty much a textbook example of a toddler biter. The good news is she's at the older end of the age group that is known for biting, so hopefully it won't take long to grow out of it.
This reminds me of the trouble we had with Brody throwing things when he was about her age. With him, we worked to redirect his desire to throw by giving him bean bags and other softer items that he could throw. A good reminder that 'this too, shall pass.' I just wish we knew of a way to redirect the biting...
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